Sexual Relations Between Married Couples

Annette Nay, MS

Copyright © 2000

Dear Annette,

This is something I'm embarrassed to talk to my Bishop about so could I talk to you about it?  What is the Church's position on oral sex? My husband wants to do it and have it done, but I'm not sure about how I feel about it.  Also what about masturbation, my husband wants to have intimate relations more than I do. Is it right or wrong for him to do that? I don't know who else to ask these things about to. Thanks.

 

Dear Sister,

All of us have had this question one time or another.  The answer to your first question about oral sex isn't well publicized.  Both President Hinckley and President Kimble has said that what ever a married couple do in the privacy of their own bedroom is their own business.  

I go one step further and say whatever is comfortable and healthy mentally, emotionally, and physically for both people in the marriage union can be engaged in.  

Sexual practices should bind the couple closer together not cause a rift.

So be kind and loving to each other and enjoy each other!

As for your second question about masturbation.  This point is well publicized as almost every one of our last seven prophets have spoken out on it.  The church considers it unacceptable when it is done alone, because it is an act that is to be saved for married couples activities together if that is their preference.

This practice done solitarily is not using this God given gift to benefit each other and strengthen the marriage union.  Instead its practice tends to eliminate the need for the spouse and is not a special element of the marriage union.

Those who participate masturbation solo are in danger of having Church sanctions placed on their membership such as being disfellowshipped.

Best wishes,

Annette Nay, MS

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