A Parent's Guide for Raising Children
Annette Nay, Ph.D.
Copyright © 1999

Use the Gospel in Your Home

• To strengthen your family you must have the spirit of the Lord in your home.
• Through the power of the Melchizedek Priesthood, dedicate your home.
• Pray daily with your children.
• Read the scriptures together.
• Hold Family Home Evening each week.
• Make sure your children to know how to get answers to prayers. Make opportunities for children to make decisions and to ask the Lord if they are correct.
• Use added love and support to reinforce your teachings on how to make choice. Read the church magazines with your children.
• Share your spiritual feelings and testimony with your family.
• Fill your homes with the sounds of worth music.
• Teach children the significance of baptism, confirmation, partaking of the sacrament, honoring the priesthood, making and keeping temple covenants.
• Teach your children the importance of living worthy of a temple recommend and preparing for a temple marriage.
• Prepare your children and your extended family with an understanding of the temple.
• The goal for your family is to be on the straight and narrow path.
• Parents be an example to your children.

Council with Your Family

• Hold family councils to discuss plans and concerns.
• Council one-on-one with family members.
• Spend individual time with your children.
• See my article on the Family Council.

Intervention and Stating Family Values

• It is the parents duty to intervene when they see their children making mistakes. Teach appropriate behavior and consequences.
• There is no such thing as unlawful censorship in the home. Only appropriate music, videos, TV shows, magazines and other media are welcome.
• Talk to your children's teachers, coaches, counselors, advisors, and Church leaders about concerns and needs of your children

Structure Children's Spare Time

• Know what your children are doing in their spare time. If they are on the Internet, know what they are doing.
• Influence your children's choice of movies, television programs, and videos.
• Help your children see the importance of wholesome entertainment.

Your Child's Friends are Important

• Help your children build good friendships.
• Make your children's friends welcome in your home.

Develop Family Togetherness

• Make your home a place where each family member feels loved and a sense of belonging.
• Communicate with each other.
• Eat together as a family, whenever possible.
• Work together as a family. Talk together as you work.
• Build family traditions.
• Plan and carry out meaningful vacations together, considering your children's needs, talents, and abilities.
• Create happy memories with your children.
• Teach your children about their family history and ancestors.

Prepare Your Child for the Future

• Help your children learn self-reliance and the importance of preparing for the future.
• Help your children develop their talents and build their self-worth.
• Help your children realize the importance of education and preparing for employment and self-sufficiency.
• Help your children with their homework.
• Show your children how to budget time and resources by your example.
• Use outside resources wisely to strengthen your family.
• Encourage worthwhile school activities for your children.

Handling Wayward Children

• When our teenagers begin testing family values, you need to go to the Lord for guidance on the specific needs of each child.
• Pray for careless and disobedient children. Hold on to them with your faith, until you see the salvation of God in their behalf.
• Your children need to know, like the prodigal's son, when they come to themselves they can turn to us for love and counsel.
• Avoid spoiling your children by giving them too much.

When a Child's Intolerable Behavior Necessitates His/Her Leaving the Home

The Ensign states that never, out of anger, are parents to lock the door, or your home, or your heart to your children. I agree with this, but realize there are situations that warrant a child's expulsion from the family and their domicile. This is due to violence or continuous behavior directly opposing family values. Once the behavior has changed the child should be allowed back into the home. Never should the child be locked out of your hearts. Your love should be unconditional. Remember the child is always wanted, the intolerable behavior is not! Prayers should always be raised up in his/her behalf for a change of heart and behavior.

Reference

May 1999 Ensign