Annette Nay, PhD

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Make a Life Away from Your Drug Addict
Annette Nay, Ph.D.
Copyright © 2003

I am not sure where to start because this is the first time that I am writing to a subject that I really never experience in my life! And I REALLY need some advice!

I am in a relationship that deals with drug addiction. I have been with my boyfriend for 3 Ĺ yrs. in Arizona, which he is original from. He has smoke pot for almost 15 yrs. of his life and has done another stuff. There has been a couple of times that he has taken off on me to do his using and then he comes back. We argue and he says heís sorry, then everything is back to normal.

I love this man, but I am at the end of the world! We now are on Guam, which I am from. He has been clean off drugs for the year weíve been here, but now I believe he has been smoking pot, and trying other things as well. I really donít know what else to do. I have friends that tell me to leave him. I wish I could! Being that he is not from here and †he has no family, so eventually when we argue he has no place to go.

Please help me! Helpless in Guam


Dear Helpless,

He is the helpless one, you are not. He is on your turf. You have family and friends for support, he has not! He is the one getting into trouble and you have a life.

Now what kind of life do you want? One with someone you can trust and count on because he cares enough about you and himself to not get into drugs?

You cannot count on a druggie. The only thing you can count on is that he will use you over and over again to get his drugs.

Do you trust this guy with your life, when he is on drugs? What if you have children? Will you trust him with their lives as well?

Throw the bum out. Donít listen to his pitiful promises or his needs. Every time you take him back you are helping him to use. He is using you!

You can do much better on your own. And, on your own, you might have to chance to find someone who really loves you and is not in love with his drugs!

Get a job, live with friends or family until you can get a place and make a life for yourself!

You can do it!


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