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Someone you love is a drug user. This person steals from you even though s/he says s/he loves you very much. This behavior will escalate until you can no longer stand his or her behavior. This will probably be after s/he has caused you a lot of grief. If will come to the point that you will lose all your positions of worth to your loved one's drug habit or you throw him or her out of your lives permanently. This person will not be allowed in to your house because s/he can not be left alone for a second.
Some families spend thousands of dollars trying one clinic after another to save their loved one. The family is giving full effort but the drug has priority to the addicted person. In essence this person loves the drug so much that even after s/he are detoxed off the drug s/he wants to go back to it and will do anything to get back into the relationship with his or her drug of choice.
The relationship with the drug becomes stronger than any relationship with God, family, or the community. The drug addicted person plunders the family's and community's wealth to take care of their habit to keep this relationship. What's worse is s/he feels it is his or her right physically, mentally, and emotionally to do so.
There is only two reasons the addicted person will end the his or her relationship with his or her drug. This is by death or when the relationship is so damaging that the person is losing his or her life or he is loosing his or her family. All too often drug addicted people give up their family and sometimes even their life to pursue their drug relationship.
For the families that watch this destructive relationship continue, there is only one thing they can do. That is to let the user choose the relationship s/he wants to keep. They cannot keep both the relationship with the drug and the family.
The family can try to change the drug addicted person but until s/he wants to change, there will be no change. That's the sad truth. It does not matter how much money is thrown at the problem. Things won't change until the behavior no longer works for of the addicted person.
How long you want to stay in this abusive relationship with your addicted person is your choice. No one can make that choice for you. Support of the drug addicted family member should be immediate as soon as the family realizes there is a problem or the family is enabling the addiction to grow and develop. Instead the sad truth is that it only happens when the addicts behavior becomes so intolerable that his lies of changing no longer work and all the love for that individual is gone. All that is left is broken hearts, broken dreams, and empty pockets. Will it end like this for you?
Steps can be taken immediately to stop the loved one.
Rules of engagement must be consistent and firm. There should be no wavering, but a united front with all the family members. Make no mistake about it, you are at war with a powerful drug. War takes some cruel but decisive actions like the ones below.
The addicted one may never be alone or have money. If money is earned by the user, it kept by someone else for his or her use as needed. These items are bought for user.
The addicted one may never have anything of worth, yours or his or hers. All items of worth are locked up. This can be in the garage, banks, and/or purchased safes for the home.
The addicted may never take a phone call without it being monitored on another phone.
In essence the addicted person is in jail, in your home and the family becomes his or her jailers. This is not a happy relationship for the addicted person or the family. Often the addicted person will run away. So what other choices does the family have?
Jail time may be a viable option. You have to understand that the person will get better connections in jail than s/he has ever had before. It is often reported that there is more drugs in jail than on the outside. S/He also is connected with other felons and learn how to do what they do. Jail may be the last option or your first. Again this is your hard choice to make.
Perhaps the last option is the best of all. You cannot control the addicted person, so turn them out, turn his or her care over to your Higher Power, and live your life to its fullest, knowing that you have done your best.
You must know that his decision has to an addict is his or her own. No one can change someone else's mind or actions. You can only change yourself and your actions. Do so!