Breaking Free from an Abusive
Relationship
Dawn Bradley Berry
The
National Coalition Against Domestic Violence has prepared a list of
recommendations on what a woman can do if she decides to stay for the time
being, based on NiCarthy's Getting Free. The following list includes the
recommendations of NiCarthy and the NCADV; plus ideas and suggestions from
various other sources.
1.
Get information. By reading this book you are taking a step toward freedom and
a new life. Read others-many more are listed in the appendix. Learn about your
situation and what options you have. Many
of the organizations listed at the end of this article will send you free
brochures and information if you write or call. Your state domestic violence
coalition is a good place to start. Gather
up the phone numbers of all the people and agencies you could call upon for help
in an emergency and afterward: hotlines, the police, shelters, friends, the sheriff, family,
the church, the prosecutor's office, the public library, the YWCA, the Salvation
Army, state and local domestic violence coalitions, and general crisis or
self-help lines.
2.
Go ahead and call the local crisis line, hotline, shelter, or coalition
for help and information. Even if
you don’t want to leave the relationship now, even if you truly believe what
happened was an isolated incident that will never happen again, it is a good
idea to find out what services are available in your community in case there
ever is a second time. Ask about crisis accommodations for you, your children,
and even your pets. Will they come pick you up in the middle of the night if
necessary? Find out how long you can stay. Do they provide, or give references
to, other services, such as counseling, legal assistance, court advocates? If
you would have to travel to another town to reach a shelter, find out how to get
there. Remember that shelters
aren't only for poor people, they help women of all income levels. Also, be
aware that most shelters offer support to women not living in the shelter as
well. Most provide counseling, group sessions, and referrals to anyone who needs
them.
3.
Pack a bag with emergency supplies such as a change of clothing for
4.
Tell trustworthy, supportive friends and family members what is going on.
They can be prepared if there is a crisis, offer emotional support, and
help in many different ways, from simply listening to providing transportation
and child care. Write a letter in your handwriting to someone you trust
detailing what your abuser has done to you, his full name, when incidents
occurred, and sign and mail it. It
may be useful later as evidence. Do
be careful to confide only in those who truly care about your well being. If
anyone tells you the abuse is your fault or that you should accept abusive
treatment, that person does not have your best interest at heart. Never listen
to this kind of talk-it is flat out wrong.
5.
Many professionals recommend self-defense training.
This type of class can also help you build self-reliance and emotional
strength. However, don't count on
such training alone to make you safe. Many
women can still be overpowered by an enraged man and end up getting more
seriously injured if they try to fight back. Also, most say to avoid bringing
weapons into the home. Far too often, weapons, especially guns, are used against
the victim or end up in the hands of children.
6.
Talk to a legal advisor. Find out
about restraining orders, divorce, and other legal concerns.
Many communities have legal advocates, lawyer hotlines, or legal aid
groups that can provide free advice and referrals to lawyers.
7
.Talk to your children about what is happening-they are almost sure to know what
is going on,or at least that things aren’t right, even if you don’t think
they have ever witnessed the violence directly.
Make certain they understand that the violence is not their fault.
8.
Prepare a safety plan for yourself and your children.
Make a list of telephone numbers of people you are sure you can depend on
in an emergency, preferably people you have talked to about the violence and who
have offered to help. Include the phone numbers of shelters, and keep this list
in your wallet. If someone you trust lives close to you, ask if you could have
keys to his or her house in case of emergency. Have an extra key for your house
and car made, and keep them in your wallet as well. You may also want to line up
people who can loan you money in an emergency.
9.
Begin thinking about what it will
be like to live independently. Consider
whether or not you will want to change jobs, if you are employed, or what kind
of work you would seek if you are not. Look into job training programs,
apprenticeships, classes in your community, public aid programs. Acquire new job
skills. Learn about community
college or extension courses, yourself to use a computer, find out where to sell
garden products, handcrafts, baked goods, or other things you know how to make.
Your public library can help you get this information, as can women’s
self-sufficiency programs, the YWCA, local schools, and state job training and
employment programs. Find out what is out there.
10.
Be aware that leaving is going to be hard, stressful, and emotionally
draining. Take care of your health,
If you start to have doubts or fears about getting out of the relationship, keep
yourself focused on why you have to go. Remember
that worst of the violence. Remind
yourself that women die by the thousands every year at the hands of men who
claim to love them.
11.
Get important documents together, such as your driver’s license, birth
certificates for you and your children, insurance papers, passports, social
security cards, wedding and baptismal records, school records, investment
records, documents from any public assistance program, leases, titles to your
car and other property, savings account books, checkbooks, credit cards,
paychecks stubs, tax returns, and medical records.
12.
Gather up the possessions that have special sentimental value, such as
family photos, heirlooms, children’s drawings, and jewelry.
Vengeful partners often destroy a women’s property when she leaves.
Also consider pets-abusers often turn on them.
13.
Don’t tell anyone where you plan to go unless you trust them
completely, Remember, abusers often become the most dangerous when women try to
leave. Try not to leave any
evidence of the changes and preparations you’re making where he could find
them. Have plausible excuses ready
in case he does find cash you’ve hidden, for example,
Say you were saving for a present for him, a special dinner our for the
two of you, something for your child.
14.
Become familiar with your monthly expenses.
List what you spend for groceries, rent, medical care, child care,
transportation to and from work, insurance, and any other fixed expenses.
You may need this information to complete forms for restraining orders,
social assistance programs, or other purposes. It's also a good way to assess
how much you will need to earn on your own.
15.Go
ahead and do things on your own. Get an new job, make friends, hire a sitter,
and go out now and then. Some partners won't notice the newfound behavior or
will grudgingly put up with it. Some partners bully only those who are afraid of
them It may be best to make these
changes during a “honeymoon phase.” Do
consider the risk involved, and proceed with caution.
16.
Start changing your life secretly, a little at a time.
Save money out of the grocery fund, garage sale proceeds, or any separate
funds you may have. Even a small amount can make a big difference.
Try to keep enough money with you all the time to pay for a cab to a safe
place and, if you don't have a trustworthy friend nearby, enough to pay for one
or more nights in a motel. Keep
small change in your pocket at all times for pay phones.
Get a credit card in your own name, and have statements sent to your
workplace or the home of a trusted friend.
17.
Don't tell the abuser you’re going to a daytime class or support group, but
go. Join a battered woman's
group-you don't have to be out of the relationship first. Get out and meet new
people. Rekindle old friendships.
18
. Make a list of the advantages and
disadvantages of leaving and staying.
19.
Learn the signs of coming violence. Work on sharpening your observation
skills. Does he drink more, find
petty things to complain about, want to go out every night, sit morosely in
front of the TV more than usual? Notice
changes in your partner before he goes into a violent rage...his tone of voice,
what he says, his habits, his behavior toward you and the children. Know and be
as certain as you can whether these changes take place weeks or merely hours or
minutes before the violence.
20.
Write down these clues in his behavior. You will have a sense of the pattern and
you will feel more self-confident of what you observe.
21.
When you see the signs coming, or preferably before, get out. Go to a trusted
friend's or relative's house-a place where there is plenty of room for you with
people who care about you.
22.
Know which motel you might go to and
how to get there. Travel from your
house to it several times for practice so, in times of high stress, you will be
familiar with the route and the location. You may want to scout out parking that
will be out of sight. It's also a good idea to consider several alternatives in
case one motel is full.
23.
Develop the habit of backing your car in the driveway.
Leave the driver’s door unlocked, but be sure to lock the other doors.
Make sure your abuser doesn’t block you in.
In that case park on the street and make up and excuse.
24.
Work out a signal system with a neighbor (preferably one who is home a
lot) in case you need help, for example, a designated window shade in the down
position means for him or her to call the police.
Make sure the neighbor knows the signal and what to do.
25.
Remove from the wall or countertop any knife rack with knives in it. Get rid of
the rack or put the knives in a hard-to-reach place, or give them to someone
else for safekeeping. Also, put scissors, letter openers, and other sharp
objects in hard-to-reach places.
26.
Make a plan so you know what you can do if the phone wires are cut or if you
find yourself without electricity. Keep flashlights handy and batteries fresh.
Know where the closest pay phone is located and how to get there by
either walking or driving. Locate the closest all-night store and other places
you could go where there are people.
27.
If there are guns in the house have someone teach you how to safely
unload them. Keep ammunition in a
separate place, or if you anticipate coming violence get rid of it.
Lock it is a file drawer or put it in so out-of-the-way-place. Unload any and all firearms.
28.
Try not to wear scarves, long necklaces, loose clothing, or jewelry.
Clothes can be grabbed and anything around your neck can be used to
strangle you.
29.
Keep a good supply of gas in the car and try to have it in working order at all
times. Learn to drive if you do not know how.
30.
Rehearse your departure. Be sure not to tell the abuser you are leaving-to
protect yourself. He will probably become more enraged and try to stop you if
you do. Anticipate the violence early enough so you can slip away while he is at
work, or if he does not leave the home to work, say you have to go out for a
common reason, like you need to get milk, groceries, diapers, or a prescription.
Offer to pick something up at the store for him. You might want to tell him you
promised a neighbor you'd bring her a recipe, a book, or a scarf she asked to
borrow. Have several plausible reasons for leaving at different times of the day
or night.
31.
If the rage builds up at night, plan to have a reason to go outside.
Start to do the laundry, walk the dog, or throw out the garbage late at
night. Keep things in the garage or your car that you might need inside, extra
garbage bags or light bulbs, for instance. Keep coats, hats, and gloves close to
each door. Keep those extra keys
and telephone numbers, as well as some extra cash, in your wallet purse at all
times. Always know where it is and keep it within grabbing distance so you can
get it on your way out.
33.
Once outside the door, just keep going. Get into the car and drive away
as quickly and quietly as possible. If you don't have a car, get on a bicycle,
go on foot, whatever it takes.
34.
Plan to take your children. They are probably terrified by the current or coming
violence. They may be less frightened at getting up and being rushed away from a
threatening person than finding out in the morning that you have disappeared
without saying goodbye. Even if the
abuser has never battered the children, you can't be sure he won’t start now,
especially when he discovers you have left the house.
35.
Plan how you will make your escape with your children.
It is more complicated that making it alone, but good preparation can
make things easier. Talk with them periodically about the importance of safety.
Teach older children to call a relative, a friend, or the police when they hear
or see violence. Teach them to go
next door to a neighbor's house, business, or some place close to call the
police.
36.
If you have a baby, tell your partner you hear him or her crying. Take the baby
out of the crib and go out a back door or window before your partner realizes
what is happening. Keep extra
blankets close to all doors.
37.
The events happen so fast that you have to leave without the children,
arrange to go back for them as soon as possible. Either pick them up at school
or return to the house with a police officer.
38.
Ensure the children's physical safety. Let them know you have not abandoned
them. You are also protecting your right to custody by getting them as soon as
you can.
In
addition to taking active steps toward ending an abusive relationship, a woman
in this difficult situation needs to look within herself to begin rebuilding her
sense of value as a human being, her self-image, and her self-worth. Ginny
NiCarthy's handbook Getting Free includes a series of simple exercises for women
who are on this path, as well as practical ideas and advice.
Organizational Resources for the
Abused
National
Organizations
National
Coalition Against Domestic Violence (NCADV)
National
Office
P.O.
Box 18749
Denver,
CO 80218-0749
(303)
839-1852
(303)
831-9251 Fax
NCADV
Membership/public Policy
P.O.
Box 34103
Washington,
D.C. 20043-4103
(202)
638-6388
(202)
628-4899 Fax
The
NCADV serves as an information and referral center for victims of abuse,
shelters, service programs, and others assisting battered women and their
children. It helps other agencies develop programs; publishes information
packets, service directories, and a newsletter, The Voice; helps acquire funding
for shelters and other services; promotes community awareness and education
about domestic violence; sponsors conferences and regional training seminars for
advocates; and supports task forces for subgroups within the battered women's
movement. Those interested in becoming members should contact the Washington,
D.C. office. Five categories of membership are available for individuals,
organizations, and youth.
Battered
Women's Justice Project
206
W. Fourth Street
Duluth,
MN 55806
(800)
903-0111
This
organization studies abused women in the criminal justice system, and provides
information to attorneys, and advocates for battered women or others working
with them.
Domestic
Abuse Project (DAP)
204
West Franklin Avenue
Minneapolis,
MN 55404
(612)
874-7063
DAP
publishes treatment manuals, research reports, and other materials. It also
conducts tailored training sessions and workshops for professionals involved in
mental health, social services, and criminal justice, as well as provides
education for the general public, across the country. DAP is especially active
in working with children from violent homes, and publishes reports and manuals
on
children's treatment.
The
Family Violence Prevention Fund
383
Rhode Island Street, Suite 304
San
Francisco, CA 94103-5133
(415)
252-8900
This
group runs public education programs, provides direct services to victims, and
develops public policy and training programs for policymakers and health care
providers. It also addresses the legal rights of battered immigrant and refugee
women.
National
Council on Child Abuse and Family Violence
1155
Connecticut Avenue NW, Suite 400
Washington,
D.C. 20036
(202)
429-6695
(800)
222-2000
Provides
information and referrals on spouse, child, and elder abuse through this
toll-free help-line operated 8:00 A.M. to 5:00 A.M. Monday through Friday,
Pacific Standard Time. Also gives assistance and information for community-based
programs, and publishes brochures, periodicals, and a newsletter.
National
Battered Woman's Hotline
c/o
Texas Council on Family Violence
8701
North MoPac Expressway, Suite 450
Austin,
TX 78759
(512)
794-1133
Currently
working to set up a national, toll-free hotline. Those willing to help are
invited to contact
National
Victim Center
309
West 7th Street, Suite 705
Fort
Worth, TX 76102
(800)
FYI-CALL
The
National Victim Center provides research, education, training, advocacy, and
resources for those working for the victims of all types of crime. Its INFOLINK
line (above) provides information and referrals to victims of crime and people
who work with them. While INFOLINK is not a crisis line and does not provide
counseling, its volunteers and staff give callers information and referrals to
victim assistance agencies in the callers' areas. Resource packages on domestic
violence, stalking, and other topics are available free of charge by calling
INFOLINK.
National
Battered Women's Law Project at the
National
Center on Women and Family Law
799
Broadway, Suite 402
New
York, NY 10003
(212)
674-8200
This
project serves as a clearinghouse for information for attorneys, advocates, and
others. It publishes a wide range of information packets for those offering
legal assistance to battered women. The publications address specific issues
affecting domestic violence victims, such as child custody, litigation
strategies, case law, the special needs of rural women, and many others. It also
disseminates law, cases, model briefs, statistics, protocol, and studies.
National
Clearinghouse for the
Defense
of Battered Women
125
South 9th Street, Suite 302
Philadelphia,
PA 19107
(215)
351-0010
This
organization provides information and resource materials to attorneys,
advocates, and expert witnesses who assist battered women charged with crimes,
as well as the women themselves, particularly those who kill in self-defense. It
publishes a newsletter, Double- Time, and coordinates a national network of
people working with women in prison.
National
Institute of Justice/NCJRS
Box
6000
Rockville,
MD 20850
(800)
851-3420
(301)
251-5500 in Maryland and Washington, D.C
The
National Institute of Justice is the principal criminal justice research agency
of the U.S Department of Justice. It develops research and collects information
about crime, its causes, and its control; trains practitioners; and distributes
information. Its clearinghouse is the largest network of criminal justice
information in the world, and maintains a document data base, electronic
bulletin board, specialized data bases, publications, and a reference and
referral service. A user's guide is available upon request.
Duluth
Domestic Abuse Intervention Project
National
Training Project
206
West Fourth Street
Duluth,
MN 55806
(218)
722-2781
(218)
722-1545 Fax
This
organization publishes and distributes a wide variety of training materials
including books, curricula, research reports, training manuals, and videotapes.
It also conducts training seminars for people involved in social programs
to assist victims of domestic violence and those in the criminal justice system.
It provides specialized training materials for those working with Native
American
National
Resource Center on Domestic Violence
6400
Flank Drive, Suite 1300
Harrisburg,
PA 17112
(800)
537-2238
(717)
545-9456 Fax
This
center furnishes information and resources to advocates, policymakers, and the
media.
National
Clearinghouse on Marital and Date Rape
2325
Oak Street
Berkeley,
CA 94708-1697
(510)
524-1582
This
business provides rape prevention education through speakers, publications, and
consultation by telephone or in person. It produces charts and packets that
answer the most common questions and provide information on marital and date
rape.
Law
Students for Pro Bono
1666
Connecticut Avenue NW, Suite 424
Washington,
D.C. 20009
(202)
462-0120
This
group provides information on free services from law students, and assists law
students interesting in starting pro bono programs at their schools.
ABA
IOLTA Clearinghouse
541
N. Fairbanks Court
Chicago,
IL 60611-3314
(312)
988-5748
This
office of the American Bar Association coordinates the programs in most states,
which collect funds from Interest on Lawyers Trust Account (IOLTA).
The money from these programs is distributed to legal service providers
who provide free legal services to low-income persons.
Center
for Women's Policy Studies
2000
P Street NW, Suite 508
Washington,
D.C. 20036
(202)
872-1770
This
organization focuses on combating gender-motivated hate crimes and studies the
efficacy of civil rights remedies. Its National Program on Girls and Violence
collects information from girls and teenagers throughout America on the violence
in their lives, and studies increasing youth violence. A fact sheet on girls and
violence is available now, with more data to be published as studies continue.
National
Coalition for Low-Income Housing
1012
14th Street NW, Suite 1200
Washington,
D.C. 20005
(202)
662-1530
Resource
Center on Child Custody and Protection
National
Council of Juvenile and Family Court Judges
Family
Violence Project
P.O.
Box 8970
Reno,
NV 89507
(800)
527-3223
(702)
784-6012
The
center, operated by The National Council of Juvenile and Family Court Judges,
provides general information, consultation, and training related to child
protection and custody issues in the domestic violence. It cannot provide legal
assistance in individual cases. Call for a publication list.
Health
Resource Center on Domestic Violence
Family
Violence Prevention Fund
383
Rhode Island Street, Suite 304
San
Francisco, CA 94103-5133
(800)313,1310
This
organization is dedicated to strengthening the health care response to domestic
violence. It provides information packets, publications, and technical
assistance for those wishing to set up programs and protocols.
Center
for the Prevention of Sexual and Domestic Violence
1914
N. 34th Street, Suite 105
Seattle,
WA 98103
(206)
634,1903
(206)
634-0115 Fax
This
center provides educational materials for religious organizations and
institutions to use in preparing curricula for clergy and Sunday school classes.
It also trains clergy and lay leaders in issues of child abuse, clergy sexual
misconduct, and domestic violence. It is not a direct service agency, but
sometimes provides referrals.
National
Organization for Women (NOW)
1000
16th Street NW, Suite 700
Washington,
D.C. 20036
(202)
328,5160
NOW
maintains a task force on domestic violence and is active m abroad range of
issues important to women.
NOW
Legal Defense and Education Fund
99
Hudson Street, 12th Floor
New
York, NY 10013
(212)
925-6635
This
sister organization to NOW, focuses on litigation and education in the areas of
gender discrimination and related issues. It sponsors a Family Law Project and
publishes various materials, including a state by state, guide to women’s
legal rights.
Domestic
Violence Project of the American Academy of Facial Plastic and Reconstructive
Surgery (AAFPRS )
1110
Vermont Avenue NW, Suite 220
Washington,
D.C. 20005
(800)
842,4546
In
1994, the educational and research foundation for the AAFPRS, in cooperation
with the NCADV, embarked on a campaign to provide free facial and reconstructive
and plastic surgery to victims of domestic violence. For information, call the
toll-free number above or contact Rita Smith at the NCADV,
Domestic
Abuse Awareness Project
P.O.
Box 1155
Madison
Square Station
New
York, NY 10159~ 1155
(212)
353~1755
(212)
353~8645 fax
This
clearing house for photography on domestic violence provides visual proof of
domestic Violence through traveling photography exhibits to raise money for
shelters and increase public awareness about domestic abuse. It was founded in
1991 by photojournalist Donna Ferrato.
State
Coalitions
The
800 numbers listed in this section are hotlines.
Alabama
Coalition Against Domestic Violence
P.O.
Box 4762
Montgomery,
AL 36101
(205)
832-4842
Alaska
Network on Domestic Violence and Sexual Assault
130
Seward, Suite 501
Juneau,
AK 99801
(907)
586~3650
Arizona
Coalition Against Domestic Violence
100
W. Camelback Road, Suite 109
Phoenix,
AZ 85103
(602)
279-2900
(800)
782-6400 (crisis line).
Arkansas
Coalition Against Violence to Women and Children
7509
Cantrell Road, Suite 213
Little
Rock, AR 72207.
(501)
663-4668
(800)
332~4443 (hotline)
California
Alliance Against Domestic Violence and
Central
California Coalition Against Domestic Violence
619
13th Street, Suite I
Modesto,
CA 95354
(415)
457-2464
(209)
524-1888
Northern
California Coalition for Battered Women & Children
1717
5th Avenue
San
Rafael, CA 94901
(415)
457-2464
Southern
California Coalition for Battered Women
P.O.
Box 5036
Santa
Monica, CA 90409
(213)
655-6098
(213)
658-8717 Fax
Colorado
Domestic Violence Coalition
P.O.
Box 18902
Denver,
CO 80218
(303)
573-9018
Connecticut
Coalition Against Domestic Violence
135
Broad Street
Hartford,
CY 06105
(203)
524-5890
(800)
281-1481
Delaware
Battered Women's Hotline, c/o Child, Inc
507
Philadelphia Pike
Wilmington,
DE 19809-2177
(302)
762-6110
D.C.
Coalition Against Domestic Violence
P.O.
Box 76069
Washington,
D.C. 20013
(202)
783-5332
Florida
Coalition Against Domestic Violence
1521
Killearn Center Boulevard
Tallahassee,
FL 32308
(904)
668-6862
(800)
500-1119 (crisis line)
Georgia
Advocates for Battered Women and Children
250
Georgia Avenue S, Suite 365
Atlanta,
GA 30312
(404)
524,3847
(800)
643-1212 (crisis line)
Hawaii
State Committee on Family Violence
2500
Pali Highway
Honolulu,
HI 96817
(808)
595-3900
Idaho
Coalition Against Sexual and Domestic Violence
200
North Fourth Street, Suite 10
Boise,
ID 83702
(208)
384,0419
Illinois
Coalition Against Domestic Violence
937
South Fourth Street
Springfield,
IL 62703
(217)
789,2830
Indiana
Coalition Against Domestic Violence
2511
E. 46th Street, Suite N3
Indianapolis,
IN 46202
(317)641-1912
(800)
332- 7385 (crisis line)
Iowa
Coalition Against Domestic Violence
Lucas
Building, First Floor
Des
Moines, IA 50319
(515)
281,7284
(800)
942-.0333 (crisis line)
Kansas
Coalition Against Sexual and Domestic Violence
820
S.E. Quincy, Suite 416-B
Topeka,
KS 66612
(913)
232-9784
Kentucky
Domestic Violence Association
P.O.
Box 356
Frankfort,
KY 40602
L
(502) 875-4132
Louisiana
Coalition Against Domestic Violence
P.O.
Box 3053
Hammond,
LA 70404-3053
(504)
542-4446
Maine
Coalition for Family Crisis Services
359
Main Street
Bangor,
ME 04402
(207)
941-1194
Maryland
Network Against Domestic Violence
11501
Georgia Avenue, Suite 403
Silver
Spring, MD 20902-1955
(301)
942-0900
Massachusetts
Coalition of Battered Women's Service Groups
210
Commercial Street, 3rd Floor
Boston,
MA 02109
(617)
248-0922
Michigan
Coalition Against Domestic Violence
P.O.
Box 16009
Lansing,
MI 48901
(517)
484-2924
Minnesota
Coalition for Battered Women
1619
Dayton Avenue, Suite 303
St.
Paul, MN 55104
(612)
646-6177
(612)
646-0994 (crisis line)
Mississippi
Coalition Against Domestic Violence
5455
Executive Place
Jackson,
MS 39206
(601)
981-9196
Missouri
Coalition Against Domestic Violence
331
Madison Street
Jefferson
City, MO 65101
(314)
634-4161
Montana
Coalition Against Domestic Violence
1236
N. 28th Street, Suite 103
Billings,
MT 59101
(406)
245-7990
Nebraska
Domestic Violence and Sexual Assault Coalition
315
South 9th, Suite 18
Lincoln,
NE 68508
(402)
476-6256
Nevada
Network Against Domestic Violence
2100
Capurro Way, Suite E
Sparks,
NV 89431
(702)358-1171
(800)
500-1556 (crisis line)
New
Hampshire Coalition Against Domestic and Sexual Violence I
P.O.
Box 353
Concord,
NH 03302-0353
(603)
224-8893
(800)
852-3388 (multi-issue state hotline)
New
Jersey Coalition for Battered Women
2620
Whitehorse/Hamilton Square Road
Trenton,
NJ 08690,2718
(609)
584,8107
(800)
572- 7233 (state hotline)
(800)
224-0211 (battered lesbian crisis line)
New
Mexico State Coalition Against Domestic Violence
P.O.
Box 25363
Albuquerque,
NM 87125
(505)
246,9240
(800)
773,3645 (crisis line)
New
York State Coalition Against Domestic Violence
Women's
Building, 79 Central Avenue
Albany,
NY 12206
(518) 432,4864